The Hung Parliament Party

This is the Tories latest, desperate election video; the Hung Parliament Party:

It's hard to critique it as its bollocks on its face and is simply fear-mongering.

There is, however, one sentence (at 2:20) which stands out more than any: that a vote for the non-Tories would lead to a

"A brave new world of undemocratic processes".

Presumably they're referring to the fact that we currently have - and may have once again if the Tories get their way - a party with only 35% of the vote having more than half the seats in Parliament.

They are referring to that, aren't they? Tweet

Outside the Big Three

I've been meaning to write summat about the election...

People are going on about a Hung Parliament, Nick Clegg, the fact that the current situation has been coming for a long time and the apparent failure of the Tories' plan to just assume that by saying "We're not Brown" would get them in power.

As previously stated, I'm going to vote for the Pirate Party UK's Alexander van Terheyden in Bethnal Green & Bow. People should also vote for us in the other constituencies we're standing in.

Instead, I've decided to cover the lesser-known candidates.

You may be aware that there's a good chance that the Greens will win in Brighton Pavillion, which would make Caroline Lucas their first MP. You may not be aware that there's a good chance of them also taking out Charles "Safety Elephant" Clarke in Norwich South - take *that* for ID cards and 28 (and an attempt for 90) days detention without charge. They're also trying to take Lewisham Deptford, presumably due to Goldsmiths University and the New Cross scene...

Probably my favourite Independent candidate is Denny de la Haye (Hackney South & Shoreditch) who is standing on a platform of putting his policies up for a public vote, i.e. he would - with a few provisos - vote whatever way his constituents would want on each issue. PPUK candidate Graeme Lambert (Bury North) has also pledged to do the same on non-PPUK areas.

I don't know much about Bushra Irfan other than she's standing in Blackburn, making her an opponent of Jack Straw and so must be supported.

Of course, there are the - how should I put it? - completely sensible and credible candidates too... Tweet

Film review: The Ghost

Roman Polanski's The Ghost Writer, as it's more accurately titled outside the UK, tells the story of Adam and Ruth Lang - a lightly-fictionalised Tony and Cherie Blair, played by Pierce Brosnan and Olivia Williams - soon after the PM's departure from number 10. Adam's previous ghostwriter, who had almost completed the PM's memoirs, has drowned in the sea surrounding the North American island on which the Langs are living. McGregor's character (who is never named) reluctantly takes on the job of finishing the book. Shortly after he arrives on the island, controversy erupts when a former colleague publicly accuses the PM of war crimes. As the Langs and their entourage - in particular, Adam's personal secretary and mistress, played by Kim Cattrall - are distracted by the intensifying media circus, the ghostwriter discovers clues left by his predecessor which point to a conspiracy in which the PM appears to have been a player.

Although the story has enough intrigue to keep your attention, it is heavily driven by dialogue and would probably work just as well as a theatre production or radio play. And because McGregor's investigation relies so heavily on written evidence, we end up having to read along with him - including watching him search the web for a few minutes as he tries to work out the connection between the PM and a supposed CIA agent. Also, for a so-called thriller, there is really little in the way of tension or indeed thrills. Apparently the movie cost $45m to produce. Most of this must have gone on actors' fees, for there is no evidence of extravagance in the set and special effects are almost non-existent.

The acting is largely decent but both Cattrall and McGregor struggle at times with their respective English accents, Cattrall resorting to speaking constantly like a Sloane in the dentist's chair - "you do raahlise haaw saahrious this is getting, don't you?", she asks him at one point - and McGregor adopting a bizarrely fey mockney twang. This is particularly noticeable in scenes involving just the two of them and left me wondering why McGregor, at least, wasn't allowed to talk with his own voice.

In short, The Ghost is a film that keeps your attention and is, on the whole, worth watching - but I'm sure it will be just as worth watching when it arrives on TV in a couple of years, and there is no pressing reason to seek it out sooner than that. Tweet

Review of Cemetery Junction

I've followed and loved everything Ricky Gervais has done since the 11 O'Clock Show, so was prepared - despite the mildly disappointing The Invention of Lying - to be bowled over by Cemetery Junction, the film he co-wrote and directed with Stephen Merchant which went on general release on Friday.

The film's story is derivative but enjoyable, involving a group of three lads in their early 20s growing up in a small town near Reading in the early 70s, struggling with boredom, the police, girls, the drudgery of work and the possibility of escape. Ricky Gervais plays the factory-worker father of the protagonist, Freddie, a clean-cut young man who is struggling to find his way, torn between his working-class background and his old childhood friends (with their self-destructive tendencies); his potentially lucrative but morally dubious and empty new job as an insurance salesman; and his desire to see the world. Meanwhile, he's developing a crush on a childhood sweetheart who is unfortunately engaged to his inattentive, sexist supervisor.

What path will Freddie take? Finding out is a diverting experience which is bolstered by two sub-plots involving his geeky friend finding his first love while his other, cockier, mate learns a few harsh lessons about his past and his probable future. The jokes come largely at the expense of the former friend and are often, as you'd expect, laugh-out-loud funny (although the humour is both slightly too absurd for the context of an ostensibly realist film and not entirely new, being based on jokes that will be familiar at least to listeners to Gervais and Merchant's erstwhile Xfm radio show in the early 2000s).

Cemetery Junction is the sort of thing you'd be happy to take three generations of your family to see, as long as they weren't mortally offended by a couple of appearances of the word which the BBFC designates "very strong". One of those rare films where I was actually disappointed when the credits rolled because I would have liked to see more (it's only 95 minutes long, which is about right: the editing is tight yet the story is given room to breathe), it's not a masterpiece, and it dissipated from my mind almost as soon as I'd seen it - but if you're looking for an entertaining hour-and-a-half, you won't be disappointed. Tweet

The return of the World Weary Detective

Back in 2006, one of my favourite blogs was the World Weary Detective.

Unfortunately, due to internal politics at the Metropolitan Police, he had to close his blog. However, it appears that he has come back.

Yay! Tweet

Daily Police Photo: International Edition

As I said yesterday, I have a special post over on Daily Police Photo in relation to my holiday.

Hope you enjoy it.

I aim to have the rest of my photos up on Flickr over the weekend. Tweet

"They'll be thinking about us..."

I'm back from my week-long holiday in Cyprus.

I enjoyed it very much.

I've taken lots of photos which will be uploaded to my Flickr account within the next few days.

I will also be doing a one-off post for Daily Police Photo of a picture which I took on my travels.

PS. Name the song I've quoted in the title. Tweet

"If we took a holiday"

I'll be away in holiday from Tuesday for a week because I'm heading to Cyrus for my sister's wedding.

I won't be posting on here, but - assuming that I can get a signal on my phone - I will be using Twitter.

I am trying to decide on a hashtag to use though; @Tola_o suggested that I use #SwiC but I was thinking of using #Cyprus10 or #SWedding. Any suggestions? Tweet